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Unity Candle


The unity candle symbolizes the very essence of the wedding ceremony. Two taper candles, representing the couple as individuals, are used to light a single center candle as a visible symbol of their commitment to each other. There are many variations on the ceremony and the individual details are completely up to you. Included below are a choice of uniity candle ceremonies to help you as you plan your ceremony. You can also design your own.Here are some ideas to help you with the planning of your Unity Candle Ceremony:

When the unity candle area is set up it is often a good idea to light the wicks ahead of time then blow them out. A pre-burned wick is easier to light (many couples have been in the middle of their ceremony and couldn’t get the wick to light!)

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There are many different variations on lighting the side tapers. Some people have them already burning before the ceremony starts, to symbolize the bride and the groom as individuals.

You can opt to have the mother of the bride and groom each light one candle with special music playing while this is going on. The mother of the groom is escorted in by either an usher or a male member of the brides family, where she will then light a taper then is ushered to her seat. The mother of the bride is escorted in by the groom himself, an usher or a male member of the grooms family, where she will light the other taper, then gets escorted to her seat. At this time the bridesmaids music begins and the ceremony starts.

The groom will light a taper before the ceremony, and after the bride is escorted in, she will light her taper.

If the couple are bringing children into the marriage, you can opt to have the children light the tapers.

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Lighting the center candle:

The couple will move to the area where the Unity Candle is displayed. Each will take a taper, and together they will light the large center candle. Some people choose to blow out their tapers, to symbolize their commitment to each other and as a show of their unity. Other couples leave their tapers lit, to symbolize that they are still individuals even though they have been united in marriage. No matter if you plan to keep your tapers lit or not, the choice is totally up to you.

If you are having an outdoor ceremony, you may want to consider not only pre-lighting the wicks of the candles, but also putting them inside glass hurricane lamps to protect them from the wind. There is nothing more frustrating than being outside and the wind prevents you from lighting your candles! You can find hurricane lamps in a variety of sizes and shapes at most craft, department or discount stores.

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U-1

The flame has traditionally been thought of as a symbol of the spirit. __________________ and ___________________, you have learned much in your individual lives. [Optional, if the mothers have lit the candles just before the ceremony: Your mothers are both here to bless your marriage, and it is fitting that they have lit the two individual candles you see here. For it is they who brought you life, and taught you your first lessons about love.] Your family members, and friends, many of whom are here with you today, have all been a part of your individual lives, and have shared with you your hopes, your dreams, your triumphs, your sufferings. But at some point the two of you met one another, and something started growing between you that was not just _____________ and not just _________________. There's a special way you are together that's just not like the way you've ever been with anyone else. You have a way of sharing with each other, of laughing and joking together, that's unlike with anybody else. That special love you felt for one another continued to grow, bringing you to this moment, when you are committing your love to one another, and building a life together.

Just as the flame you are about to light is not created solely by either candle, so too is your love not the sole possession or creation of either of you. As a symbol of the spirit of love that has grown between you, I would like to ask you to light the Unity Candle at this time.

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U-2

_________ and ___________ are going to light their Unity Candle, a symbol of their marriage relationship. The candles from which they light it have been lit by their mothers to represent their lives to this moment. The lights, representing the faith, wisdom, and love they have received from their parents, are distinct, each burning alone. ________ and ________-- will light the center candle to symbolize the union of their lives. As this one light burns undivided, so shall their love be one. From now on, your thoughts shall be for each other rather than for your individual selves. Your joys and sorrows shall be shared alike. May the radiance of this one light be a testimony of your unity. May these candles burn brightly as symbols of your commitment to each other, and as a tribute to your parents' lasting and loving marriages.


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U-3

This candle you are about to light is a candle of Marriage. It's fire is magical because it represents the light of two people in love.This candle before you is a candle of Commitment because it takes two people working together to keep it aflame. This candle is also a candle of Unity because both must come together, giving a spark of themselves, to create the new light. As you light this candle today, may the brightness of the flame shine throughout your lives. May it give you courage and reassurance in darkness. Warmth and safety in the cold. And strength and joy in your bodies, minds, and spirits.  May your union be forever blessed.

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U-4

From every human being there rises a light that reaches straight to heaven. And when two souls who are destined to be together find each other, their streams of light flow together, and a single, brighter light goes forth from their united being. In this spirit, bride and groom, take your individual candles and light together a third candle which signifies your marital bond. May the light of love, and the light of understanding, and the light of respect, and the light of tolerance shine eternally for you both.

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U-5

Now, we're going to engage in a ceremony of spiritual symbolism. Ancient sages tell us that for each of us, there is a candle, a symbol of our own inner light, but that no one can kindle his or her own candle. Each of us needs someone else to kindle it for us.When two people fall in love, they kindle each other's candles, creating great light and joy and glorious expectations.

Now, __________ and _____________, I'd like you to remember when it was in your relationship that you first realized you were truly in love and wanted to spend the rest of your lives together. And holding that thought...___________________, take your candle, symbol of the inner light in ___________, lit by the eternal light, with the dedication to rekindle it again and again, whenever necessary. And ____________, take your candle, symbol of the inner light in _____________, lit by the eternal light, with the dedication to rekindle it again and again, whenever necessary.

With these candles, we can see how to achieve a beautiful marriage. In your marriage, you will try to bring these lights, the symbols of yourselves, closer and closer to each other, until they become (join the flames) one great torch of light a radiant symbol of love, joy, peace and harmony. (hold flames together) This is the mystery of the union two becoming one. Yet, it is vitally important to remember that there are always really two (divide the flames) in a marriage, each with his or her own desires, yearnings, dreams and wishes. And these must be respected and responded to with great love, with great compassion and with genuine tenderness.

We know that it is the prayer of your beloved, as it is the prayer of each of us here, that you will continuously light these candles of love, so that there will always be light and joy, peace and harmony in your hearts and in your home.

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U-6

The scriptureS tells us that life is like a flame, It has its own warmth, and its own brillance. But it's in the union of Two, that something brighter, warmer, more wonderful takes place.

You have chosen the Unity Candle as a symbol of your love and life to come, and the lighting of the Unity Candle signifies that you are now TWO in ONE flesh. (The Bride and Groom goes to the Unity Candle which the Mothers lit before they were seated at start of the ceremony.)

I ask you now, will you light your Unity Candle, from the Mother's Candles previously lit, which symbolized the fate and life they have shared with their children.

(After the bride and groom take the flames of the two mothers' candles previously lit, and light their Unity Candle, they blow out the flame of the mothers' candles, and put them back in the holder)

________ and __________ Please join hands, look into each others eyes, and repeat after me.

Entreat me not to leave you, or to return from following you:
Where you go I will go;
Where you lodge I will lodge;
Your people will be my people, and your God my God.

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Optional Additions

_____________ and _____________ will now extinguish their own candles, thus letting the center candle symbolize the union of their lives. As this one light cannot be divided, neither will their lives be divided.

If you'd prefer to leave your tapers lit, try this one...____________ and ______________ come into their marriage relationship as individuals and they do not lose their identity, rather they use their individuality to create and strengthen the relationship of marriage. Therefore, the three candles remain lighted, one for each of them and one for their marriage, as symbols of their commitment to each other and to a lasting and loving marriage.

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With Children

Option 1: This marriage is not just the joining of __________ and _________, it is also the joining of (children's names), of their families and their friends to build a strong community.

Option 2: In the quiet of this special moment we give thanks for all the rich experiences that have brought _______ and ______ to this marriage. We are grateful for the values taught to them by those who have loved them and nurtured them throughout their lives. We are grateful that within _______ and ______ there is a great love for God and for each other. We are grateful too for the resources to use this love to create a home for each other and for (children's names).

Option 3: This candle before us symbolizes the joining of ________'s and _______'s past and of the new family they have formed here today. It should also serve as a reminder to them of their faith in God who enriches their marriage in every way.

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Remembering those who have passed

This ceremony, if in a different way, is also strengthened by those who are present today only in our memories. Their roles in your lives are no less diminished as we celebrate today's joyous moments. We ask everyone here to to join with _________ and _________ in fond memory of all these people, and in particular; (names of loved ones).

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